Terrified, but not stopping
I am feeling terrified of the future. This is a common thread of my life. So much so, that I often find comfort in the terror. At least if I embrace the fear, then I can usually be certain that I will at least be right about the outcome. “Ah-ha! See, I knew I would fail. ” Ah… pay off. I’m right. “See, I told you I would fail. I told you I’m not good enough. I told you I couldn’t do it.” Ugh. Exhausting.
After all of those conversations in my head, I am still not giving up. Thank you for the encouragement I received from my husband last night and from the filmmaker I met at the BBQ today. Here are the lessons I have learned this weekend. Well, actually reminded of… these are things that I know, but must be told repeatly: 1) Be clear on my vision. Know exactly what I am striving for and why. Even if I am unclear on the ‘how’. 2) Ask for help. I will be surprised. There are people who want to help, support, and contribute. 3) Do not give up. Even if things fail, then I will move on to what is next. I will learn from my mistakes and try again. If it is important to me, then I will keep working towards my vision, my goals.
What’s next: “The New 30”. ONWARD!